This morning, I woke up with facial allergies. The kind that doesn’t really itch like crazy but leaves your whole face red, blotchy, a little swollen, and hot. It was not a pretty sight to see, nor was it a good feeling to have. A lukewarm bath later, my skin didn’t exactly improve, and I thought of rushing to Dr. Aivee Teo’s clinic. But today I have errands I needed to do, tasks I needed fulfilled, and I couldn’t find a free hour in between errands (though if there was no bad traffic in the city, I’d have been able to). So I realize my visit to my skin doctor will have to wait, and I just have to D-I-Y this with Dr. Teo’s skin cream (the one she prescribed from her clinic post- skin treatment).
I have in the past, openly discussed my nose job and the days post- op. You have no idea how liberating that was for me to discuss it and to share my post- op treatments I had from Dr. Aivee’s clinic. Our society’s idea of beauty is honestly so messed up nowadays, and the bar has been raised so high. Social media does not help either, and these mobile beauty apps seem to do everything but portray what is actuality and what is reality. It is so easy to get lost in them– filters just do wonders that many who love taking selfies or OOTD (outfit of the day) photos can’t live without them. I’d be a total hypocrite if I were to say that I don’t use those. Because I do. But our idea of beauty has become so altered because we no longer see the unedited photos. Everyone has made it a mission to keep that away from social media. But where is the real unfiltered picture? And when do you see it? It’s in your bathroom– and you see it in the morning shortly after you wake up, as you go into your bathroom to do your morning business to get ready for the day. I know. Sh*t lol!
I don’t know about you peeps, but I most certainly look (and feel) like an ugly troll (coz there are cute trolls haha) every morning lol. Very few people actually look amazing with real (not made to look like) bed head and morning face. How many of you secretly cringe at your image as you brush your teeth and think to yourself,” Do Angelina Jolie, Kendall Jenner, and Irina Shayk react the same way when they see their reflection in the mirror first thing in the morning?”
Damn. *Sourgraping face on lol* What we’d all give to know that they are mortals like us and also look like trolls in the morning lol.
I felt emboldened this morning to take photos of my face. Yes, a series of selfies (without other people in it). To those who don’t know me well, let me tell you– I honestly don’t like taking solo selfies. Not a big fan of it unless I have friends with me and we all take it together. Why am I not a big fan of selfies? I suppose I never really felt confident about my face and about my skin. You see, I was not born with flawless, porcelain- smooth skin, and I do have to work at it to keep it clear (thanks to regular maintenance at The Aivee Institute). I can’t just use any new skincare product on my face or my skin breaks out. And then it’ll take days to get my skin to go back its normal state. Today is one of those days. Skin is not happy. At all. So I decided I will share the selfies I took, which I feel are really sooo unflattering. But hey, I figured if you don’t wanna look at them, just close this tab lol. If you look at me differently next time, it’s ok too because I still won’t have a problem with you (though you might have one with me now lol). My end goal is this– I am hoping this will jolt many of you, to be reminded of what is still “real” and what no longer is today. And that if you don’t have the face that falls into what is society’s standard of beauty, it’s not the end of the world!
I am posting a grid of selfies below which began with my skin free of any make- up or any photo filter on the first top left photo. (Follow photo sequence from top left to right, then bottom left to right). Verrry blotchy red face, discoloration of the skin around my eyes, and oh, unkempt eyebrows lol. That was my after- bath look today.
On the 2nd photo from top left, I applied a thin coat of Avene tinted sunblock. *Crap what’s with my eyebrows hahaha*
On the 3rd photo, I used a concealer around my eyes and a bit under my nose. I have these spider veins under my nose– a result either of rubbing my nose a lot (I have recurring allergic rhinitis which causes my itchy and icky drippy nose eww).
4th photo: Haha finally filled in those weird eyebrows. Can I just say that I have been contemplating on getting my eyebrows tattooed (or whatever procedure that’s called) ? Because I can never seem to fill out my eyebrows properly. It’s either I really don’t know how to do it properly, or my eyebrows are just not even. Therefore they’ll never be on fleek lol. Anyway as I have stated, I am still contemplating on the procedure (because I have a super low tolerance for pain).
5th photo: Patted a bit more skin tint onto certain areas of my face. Also used the eyebrow pencil on my eyelids. This was the “finishing touches” photo.
6th photo: Selfie again, but this time with some light skin filter. Ahhh what a difference that makes. And these filtered photos are what you see on my social media. This is the Social Media Face lol
I only used these products on my face today, and it took me 7 minutes to do it (haha I timed it).
I like lipsticks too, but I am very poor at remembering to touch up. My lips also get dry fast (because I don’t drink enough water), so I prefer to use lippies only on certain occasions.
So did I feel better after putting on those products? Won’t deny it, yes! I felt like I had a protective armor on my face and was ready to meet people. I felt better and more confident, even if I knew my skin underneath the makeup was still reacting and flaring up. Is this what beauty is to me? No. Again I won’t be the first to volunteer and say I am beautiful, especially with my idea of what beautiful is (hello Irina Shayk haha). If I dared say I was pretty, I’d also gag seconds thereafter lol. What matters to me now when it comes to beauty, is that I feel and look acceptable *in my eyes*, and acceptable in that the other person doesn’t gag in front of me because s/he looked at me lol 🙂 And I suppose what really matters to me is that my skin just stays healthy and flare- up free. Sigh.
This post is a reminder for all of us to drink a LOT of water because that will really help flush out toxins inside our bodies. Staying hydrated does wonders for the skin (haha I should practice what I preach). Getting a good night’s sleep helps heaps too (haha goodbye Netflix). And lastly, do remember that what we all see of selfies and beauty photos on social media are not necessarily “real”, so let none of that be your barometer or standard of what is beautiful. If you want to change your look and go for cosmetic procedures, I’m all for that too though do it in moderation, and don’t let it consume you entirely.
Most important of all, as long as you can accept yourself (and you should learn to), that’s all that matters. Those who judge you for the way you look should not even be any of your concern. Remember that their opinions of you don’t and should never, ever matter. Find acceptance within yourself and you will understand what is really beautiful 🙂
Happy Monday, peeps!!