A Birthday Self- Reflection

Sooo… I turn a year older today!

And though the prospect of earning another year to my age initially daunted me (haha hello slower metabolism, more health issues), I can honestly share that it has also liberated me.

In the years past, I had so many fears– two of them (which I highlight today) included the fear of being judged by society and the fear of losing friends whom I’ve invested my emotions and my time.

But today, I am proud to share that as you get older, you become less and less concerned with the talk about you (it just becomes noise and you will find it super easy to tune out), and you find more reason to be concerned about your own well- being, emotional health, and peace. It isn’t that you become more narcissistic. You just become more self- aware.

You also won’t mourn over the loss of certain “friends,” those whom you’ve known for a long time, those whom you had spent considerable time with, or those whom you thought would be the light to your darkness (operative word: thought). It’s either you both evolved and no longer share the same values, they become negative and judgemental, or they probably did something hurtful… whatever they have done to drive a wedge into the friendship, you will be surprised to find that it is no longer difficult to walk away from them– because you know your value and worth as a person and as a friend. But if you were the one who wronged them, you will also have become mature enough to lower your pride and apologize to them to save your friendship.

You will begin to understand yourself more and realize that you had been sweating the small stuff in the past. You will learn more about gratitude and about understanding the real meaning of quality, quiet time (and it’s not staring into your tiny screen of a phone).

You will find greater pleasure being in more intimate settings and gatherings. You will value your family so much more if you haven’t already before (especially if they’ve been your rock in the most difficult times). And you will become choosier with whom you spend time and be completely at peace with the thought that you will not be liked by everyone. Because it is ok that you cannot please everyone– it is not your responsibility or mission in life to achieve that.

You will become more accepting of yourself and learn to really enjoy your own company. You will also be more comfortable in your own skin– wrinkles, extra skin folds and all. (Haha and if all else fails, there’s always Dr. Aivee Teo at The Aivee Institute *truth: I have yet to try botox because I have too many allergies and am also afraid of needles… lol ok I’m a coward but you still have to give me props because I had “survived” a nose procedure done a few years ago!*  That said though, my skin had so much help from Dr. Aivee’s laser treatments– and I’m very happy about the improvement)

You will realize there is no point being angry or upset with those who maligned or hurt you, past or present. You eventually find within yourself to forgive them and learn to wish them well. You hope they find their own peace and happiness so they can stop killing their own soul by projecting their bitterness onto others. You learn to shed off the pain, hurt, and trauma you had suffered (at your own hands or at the hands of others), and learn to open your heart. You learn to love and to trust again. Because what you put out there in the universe will come back to you. And if you keep an open mind and a grateful heart with no hatred, you get all that back. And this much I can tell you– it is an incredible, heart- warming feeling!

Turning a year older becomes more meaningful each time. You have battle scars to prove you’ve been through a lot, but you’ve also proved that you’ve survived them all, are still standing, and smiling!! Your life journey continues, and it will only get better– I believe I am proof of that 🙂 I haven’t been this content, at peace with myself, and this happy in years!!!

Oh and lastly, Happy Father’s Day to all fathers out here who have dedicated themselves to loving their children and families unconditionally! And this greeting also goes out to all the mothers who have been playing the role of both father and mother to their children. You deserve to be recognized for all the sacrifices you have made too. I hope your kids make your day special and memorable! And kids, remember to show appreciation to your parents 🙂

Much love, peace, and happiness to you all this Sunday! And big P.S.– to the wonderful peeps who have always been sincere with me, who have always believed in me and supported me, friends and family, loved ones, THANK YOU!!!!


  1. Happiest birthday Ingrid! Everything that you said here is absolutely true to me.. I am at my happiest point in my life right now after learning how to love myself more and value the most important people in my life.. No worries, no pretensions, no expectations, just giving, loving and accepting